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Wild Man Tamed & I Take the Blame September 9, 2010

Posted by Kimmothy in Dreams, Life, Marriage, Work.
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Has anyone seen that new show on the History Channel called Swamp People? I know, the name is a little off-putting. But as someone who will now apparently watch reality shows about ANY type of job whatsoever (I blame Deadliest Catch for this), I have to say it’s pretty entertaining – who wouldn’t enjoy watching some grizzled Cajuns hunt alligators in the Lousinana swamp? Last night we saw I think what was the second episode, and it brought up a discussion that’s been held several (hundred) times in our house: Brian’s career choices.

When I met him he was a 23-year-old long-hair working with a crew that applied stucco to newly built homes. Kinda like drywall but for the exterior and it’s bumpier. He’d been at it for several years by that time and was doing well enough that he’d been out from under his parents’ rule and assistance for about five years. He told me then: I’m not the type of person who will ever be able to work in an office, sitting at a desk. Sure, fine, whatever – you have long hair and you love to read; what do I care about your job.

After a couple more years of it though, he was burnt out, so it was decided he’d go to school. Golf course maintenance was the most logical choice, as my dad, who was was a teaching pro, had talked it up as a great career for someone who likes working outside but also someone he would like to help support his daughter.

Halfway through school Brian realized studying plants, flowers, trees and chemicals was more interesting than simply turfgrass, so he switched his major to landscape. I think it was a good choice for him, as he’s been pretty satisfied with it over the years and has continued his education with it, aquiring certifications and things like that. He seems, from what I can tell, to be pretty happy in his current job.

There was one little hiatus though, for about a year when he went way way down to South Florida (far away from me) and worked as a commerical fisherman. And this is the job that he loved more than anything he’s ever done, before or since. The only reason he’s not doing it still is because I flat refused to move down there – my goal had always been to come back HERE, not go farther south. If you’ve ever been to Fort Myer’s you’d understand what I’m talking about. And because he was gone long periods of time, it wasn’t sustainable for more than the year or so he did it. I’d been happy to support him in the endeavor because I knew how happy he was, but after awhile it had to stop.

GUILT. To this day every time we’re watching one of those stupid shows or something about fishing comes up in real life, I feel horrible. I know and appreciate how rare it is to work at a job you truly love. I’ve been gone from the one I loved for three years now and still miss it every day, so I can relate. And no, there aren’t any opportunities for him to fish (for a living) where we live now – we’re two hours from the ocean and freshwater fishing doesn’t provide any financial gain (unless you’re one of those amazing bass guys who do nothing but enter and win tournaments but that’s kind of like being a professinal bowler – there aren’t too many who can make that work).

I know he likes being home with me every night; the separation had started to get to him toward the end of that time as well. He likes my cooking and his Fox News and daily football stats and the PlayStation. But I also know for certain part of him that wishes he could go out into the wilderness for months at a time and shoot and skin whatever he’d eat for dinner that night. It runs all up and down and through his dad’s side of the family and some of them do devote a lot of their free time to hunting and fishing and sleeping in tents. Of course for them it’s a hobby and not a career, which helps.

I don’t know; there’s not really any solution to it. Besides wanting a family, I’d say this ranks up there pretty high on the list of Life’s Disappointments. Which I realize is obviously part of life, blah blah. But I still wish there was a way I could figure out how to make some of these things attainable for us. Most of us have to work but I wish more of us could love it as much as those lucky few do.

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Comments»

1. Heather - September 9, 2010

*sigh* I could totally be down with a guy who was gone most of the time. 😀

Kimmothy - September 11, 2010

Hee…you need to find a nice fisherman! Except you don’t like seafood, so maybe a trucker?

2. morethananelectrician - September 9, 2010

He made this “sacrifices” of personal things for you. This makes you kind of a special person. Think about it that way. This is what life is about.

Kimmothy - September 11, 2010

Thank you for that.


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