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Three to five February 23, 2009

Posted by Kimmothy in Baby-Making, Health.

The appointment went well this morning. I got probed again and we got to see yet another picture of my uterus. They took more blood to test my thyroid and to make sure I’m not lying about having been vaccinated for measles. I peed in a cup to prove I’m not already pregnant. They gave us a lesson on injecting the Follistim, which job will be Brian’s since I’ve never injected drugs before. He seemed a little too excited about the prospects but we’ll see how well he does when it comes time for it on Friday night. He requested the biggest needle they had which made everyone laugh but me. By the way, have you ever had blood drawn from the back of your hand instead of your arm? Hurts like a bitch. But I guess my veins decided to be shy today, unlike my ovaries who showed up proudly, just waiting for the opportunity to finally do the job they were put on this earth for. It’s about freaking time.

I planned to take the easy way out to finish up on the quitting smoking and had had the doctor call in a drug called Chantex for me a couple of weeks ago. I figured between the major cutting back I’ve already done and that, things would go fairly smoothly. Until I found out this afternoon my insurance doesn’t cover it. And that without insurance the cost would be $145. Do YOU have an extra $145 hanging around, because I sure as shit don’t. I can’t go back on Wellbutrin either, because it’s not a pregnancy safe drug, so guess who’s about to kick it old school and go hardcore cold turkey? This time tomorrow I predict raving lunacy.

But seriously. This week is all about taking really expensive drugs to try to grow egg follicles. The nurse told us today the optimal number they’re looking for is three to five of them. Any less and things get postponed a little while longer. Any more, and we have to make a decision on what to do with the extras. We are looking for three to five, so keep that number in your head and will it into being, could ya? But while I’m attempting to grow three to five nice healthy egg holders, why the fuck would I do something as stupid as smoking and jeopardize that? I’m dumb enough to have started smoking to begin with, but I’m not THAT dumb. So every time I think I’m losing my mind with a craving, I plan on visualizing those three to five innocent little follicles trying to grow nice and long for me. Cigarettes vs. healthy baby = no comparison. I realize plenty of people have smoked yet had healthy (?) babies. Courtney fucking Love had a healthy baby and bitch shot heroin while she was pregnant (you can still read the Vanity Fair article that she tried to sue over and lost). Luckily I am not Courtney Love, nor am I someone who could live with herself if I did something that could potentially harm one little fingernail on my potential child.

I’ve waited a long time for this. I will do everything in my power to make it happen.

Now – does anyone have a piece of gum they can spare? Or a few (hundred) packs?



1. iamheatherjo - February 23, 2009

Want me to send you another care package? Bubblegum and lollypops. I will!

You’re strong enough to do this cold turkey, I just know it. I’ve always known it. We just have to convince you. 🙂

(thinking) 3:5 3:5 3:5 3:5 3:5 …..

2. morethananelectrician - February 24, 2009

Whew! Cold-turkey. You have led me to believe that you are a pretty determined person in every part of your life. I am pretty sure this is something that you can tackle too.

3. Dyskinesia - February 24, 2009

Well, here’s a smiley moment: It’s an anecdotal fact (yes, I said that to make you laugh) that many, many women’s veins go to total crap when they are pregnant because something in all those hormones changes them. Maybe your body really is prepping. 😀 I’m thinking positive here!

And don’t think for a second I wouldn’t take a pretty magic marker and “tattoo” a 3 on one hand and a 5 on the other so that I had something to “see” when I wanted a craving! Go Girl!

4. Kim - February 24, 2009

Heather – You spoiled me too much with the first package; I promise I'll be picking up my weight in gum and lollies tomorrow!

MTAE – I am, and it's made me really mad I haven't done it before now. There's nothing good about it. I wish I'd never started. It sucks having to admit something has control over you.

Dys – I'm totally writing a 3 & a 5 on my hands today; that was a killer idea.

5. Taoist Biker - February 24, 2009

I’ll be thinking “3-5” pretty hard today. Even though just thinking the phrase says to my brain “That’s how long I’ll spend in jail if I punch the shit outta somebody who REALLY deserves it.”

Good luck with the quitting smoking – I’m finding this caffeine thing hard enough, I can’t imagine going cold turkey on the cigs!

6. Kim - February 24, 2009

TB – I keep thinking of that doors song: “Five to One baby, one in five; no one here gets out alive” – I’ve been singing it since 3:00 in the morning when I woke up.

7. snerkology - February 24, 2009

When will you know???? I’m all a-squee with anticipation!

8. Kim - February 25, 2009

Snerk – My appointment is Sunday morning at 8:00 and I’ll get another ultrasound to see if the very expensive fertility drugs have done their job all week. I can’t even think about the fact it’s only Tuesday right now.

9. Kristin D - February 25, 2009

You can do it. You really can. And three to five. Three to five. It’s my new mantra. Three to five.

10. Kim - February 25, 2009

Thank you, Sister – you’re my inspiration. Great, now that fucking song is in my head.

11. Shari - February 25, 2009

WOW!! That’s a lot to take in. I love that you are doing positive visualization to make it happen. I totally believe it works. I’ll send you guys some good vibes. Any time you want to talk technical medical stuff, I’m here for you. It doesn’t phase me a bit. Also, try this, you and Brian practice for 5 minutes a day, what it will be like when you find out your pregnant. Feel it. Jumping for joy, crying, smiling, the whole bit, saying to each other, “We’re pregnant.” As you can tell, I’m still a little fluffy around the edges.

12. Kim - February 25, 2009

Shari – We’ve kind of been doing that, not even on purpose, like it just sort of happens. Everything has gone so well since we started this process, we’re both VERY optimistic, which as you know goes against my usual feeling of imminent doom. I really think it’s going to work.
I have A LOT of questions on the medical front, even with all the research I’ve done. I might have to bombard you with some soon.

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